\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nTo be masculine is to be a <\/span>servant leader<\/span><\/b>. Traditional masculinity rewards leadership and my male interviewees resonated with this trait; however, their style of leadership primarily focused on servant leadership. I interviewed Austin, a Christian man, who told me that service is a form of putting his faith into action. The Bible states to \u201clove thy neighbor\u201d and to Austin, this means prioritizing the needs of his community. Caleb, a Jewish man, shared a story about his grandfather, a positive role model to him. His grandfather exemplified servant leadership by going out of his way to improve the lives of his fellow community members, inspiring him to do the same.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nTo be masculine is to be <\/span>balanced<\/span><\/b>. Traditional masculinity gives more respect to \u201cmasculine\u201d traits such as strength and power and less respect to \u201cfeminine\u201d traits such as compassion and sensitivity. However, not all men navigate the world using this lens. Neel, a Hindu man, follows Shaktism, a belief system that embraces the feminine divine. Through this tradition, he learned about the role of goddesses in Hinduism and it gave him a framework to understand how femininity works in conjunction with masculinity. Additionally, Greg, an Episcopalian man, mentioned to me how observing the behaviors of his pastor, an expressive queer woman of color, gave him permission as a young boy to tap into both his masculine and feminine traits.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nTo be masculine is to be <\/span>brave<\/span><\/b>. While traditional masculinity recognizes bravery as a sign of strength, it ironically requires bravery to reject its harmful attributes too. Daniel, a Mexican man, told me how heavily his community drank alcohol. Within his family, masculinity was equated with how much one is able to drink. Daniel was not interested in excessive drinking, but felt the pressure to partake in order to gain respect from his family members. Instead of succumbing to pressure though, he politely rejected the drinks. While his family did not understand at first, they ultimately respected him for his bravery and for his decision.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nTo be masculine is to <\/span>understand one\u2019s values<\/span><\/b>. When speaking with James, a Pentecostal man, he shared that the young men in the church he attended as a boy prided themselves on their infidelity and misogyny, which opposed the values that his religion taught him. Instead of following those boys blindly, James took a moment to reflect. He labeled the negative forms of masculinity that he observed. Then, he identified what values were important to him and what values he wanted to see in the world. From then on, James was able to decide which masculine behaviors were aligned with his value system and which were not.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nTo be masculine is to be an <\/span>advocate for women and girls<\/span><\/b>. It may not be obvious how traditional masculinity and feminism can work together. Yet, there are men advocating for gender equality in different ways. In a conversation with Asif, a Muslim man, I learned that he advocates for more Muslim women to join the leadership boards of the local mosques. Without their representation, he believes the mosques are denying the sisters of the Muslim community the opportunity to contribute their knowledge and skills.\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nAfter conducting these interviews, I realized how expansive the definition of masculinity actually is. It may seem like only one form of masculinity is accessible to boys and men; however, that is changing. Men are finding ways to unlearn the negative and unhealthy lessons they were taught as boys and navigate the world through a lens of service, balance, bravery, introspection, and advocacy. This gives me hope. As men, we have the responsibility of setting an example for young boys who are watching our actions and listening to our words. What example do we want to set?\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n <\/p>\n
All names were changed to protect the identities of the interviewees.\u00a0<\/span><\/i>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nThis article was prepared by Suraj Arshanapally in his personal capacity. The opinions expressed in this article are the author\u2019s own and do not reflect the view of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, the Department of Health and Human Services, or the United States government.<\/span><\/i>\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<\/div>\n \n